


bittersweet

by broikawa



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Anxiety, Dreams and Nightmares, Hurt/Comfort, Late Night Conversations, M/M, Ronan Lynch-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-17
Updated: 2019-08-17
Packaged: 2020-09-02 14:16:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20277256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/broikawa/pseuds/broikawa
Summary: being a dreamer has both ups and downs. ronan knows this well.or; adam and ronan care more about each other than they do themselves





	bittersweet

**Author's Note:**

> they r in love......................

Ronan didn’t like to dream when Adam was there.

He didn’t want him to see him struggle to move when he woke up and he didn’t want him to see him anxious because he couldn’t move his hands and he didn’t want him to see him if he had a nightmare. He didn’t want him to see him if he had one like _that_ _one_, the one that nearly killed him. He didn’t need that.

_ Adam _ didn’t need that.

“Fuck,” he said, curling into himself.

He felt Adam stir. _ Please don’t wake up _.

He did anyway, because no one could tell him what to do.

“Ronan?” he muttered, half-asleep. “Are you okay?” His eyes were barely open.

“I’m good,” he lied. It came out half a choke.

Adam sat up, rubbing his eyes. He looked down at Ronan, still half curled up. “Shit, Ronan,” he said, now awake.

There was a dream knife in his hand – he hadn’t even noticed it.

Ronan sat up too, dropping the knife on the mattress.

“Fuck,” he said again. “Shit, I’m sorry.”

If you ever got one, an apology from a Lynch meant it was serious, and Ronan was never more serious about anything in his life. At least he could feel his hands. A hand was placed on his cheek and he leaned into it. He was starting to copy Adam’s habit of closing his eyes when he was stressed, and he understood when he did it so often.

“Don’t apologize,” he told him. He sat closer, pressing his lips to his forehead. “I’ll take it downstairs, okay? I’ll be right back.” The hand was removed from his cheek and he already wanted it back. Adam took the dream knife by the handle and left the room. Then he came back, as he always did, and sat down next to Ronan, who now had his back against the wall and his legs stretched out. He did the same. He took his hand.

“Are you okay?” he asked. It was a simple question and, quite frankly, a stupid one becuase how could he, Ronan Lynch, dreamer of dreams, even begin to answer it? Where would he start? Could he even start?

He went with the answer Adam wanted to hear: “I think so.” He followed it with, “I’m sorry.”

Adam looked at him. “You don’t need to apologize” He felt the grip on his hand get a little tired.

Ronan looked back at him. His eyes were soft, either from tiredness or tenderness or concern. Maybe all three. “You look tired,” he said. His voice was small.

“You say that like I’m not always tired,” Adam teased. It got a smile out of both of them. “Do you want to go back to bed?” he asked after a while.

“I think so,” he said again.

He didn’t move right away. “Do you want to cuddle?”

“You ask like I’m going to say no.”

“I thought I’d ask anyway.”

“Of course I want to fucking cuddle.”

Adam’s smile vocalized his thoughts: _ there he is, he’s back, he’s okay _.

They got under the covers, and Adam held his arm open to let him come closer. He kissed his forehead once they were comfortable. This is what love felt like, really, to Ronan – comfort and soft concern, console and security. This was it, and he was in love. He kissed Adam on the chin.

Dreaming when Adam was there was a bittersweet thing.

When he wasn’t there, Ronan felt better knowing he wouldn’t be in the way of possible danger or damage, and Adam had been damaged enough. He wasn’t sure what he’d do if he ever caused more. When he _ was _ there, Ronan felt better knowing that it was okay, that _ he _ was okay, that everything’d be okay. He always felt better with Adam next to him.

“Adam?” he said against his cheek.

“Hm?”

He looked at him, properly. “Thank you.”

He smiled. “Of course.”

Even smaller, his voice got. “I love you.”

Even bigger, his smile got. “I love you, too.”

**Author's Note:**

> november hurry up i need more pynch content
> 
> tumblr: etherealparrish  
lovecore blog: ohmyhoneybun  
studyblr: adriendoesthings


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